I don't think I have had a more hopeless day than today. I just want to stand in a padded room and throw myself at the floor, scream at the top of my lungs and cry until I don't have a tear left to shed. Am I feeling sorry for myself, YES! Here it comes...............
WHEN IS SOMEONE GOING TO DO SOMETHING ABOUT ALL OF US SICK PEOPLE WHO ARE LOSING EVERYTHING IN OUR LIVES TO LYME DISEASE????????????????????????????????????
Insurance Companies- You idiots pay more for treatment now than if you just paid for iv and aggressive treatment in the beginning.
Congressmen- Stop allowing this to happen. You've seen us. You've been to the lectures, seminars, you've read the letters. What are you going to do? When? How long is the suffering going to continue?
Lyme Literate MD, Attys, Scientists- stop fearing and start fighting.
I am dying here and I have no advocate. My husband is almost as sick as me. I can't open and sort my bills. I can't manage my house, I can't manage my business, I have no insurance, I can't get treatment that works. Almost four years and I'm dying inside. Forget if my body survives this, I am not even a shell of the person I used to be. I want me back. I don't mind the pain. I can live with the lack of energy. I can't lose anymore of me. The me who loved people, who cared more about everyone more than herself, the me who did thoughtful things for people, the me who listened to people without wandering away not even realizing what the conversation was about. I want me back. I insist on it. I want to go on vacation. I want to make a pie for my husband. I want to smile, just to smile and mean it. I want to hug my son without bursting into tears wondering when I'll forget all of our memories of him growing up. I want to see a horse without bursting into tears remembering when my husband taught me how to ride and going down to feed my horses in the morning. I want to be excited about something. I want to work without being ashamed of what i can't do. I want to be proud of myself. I want people to be able to rely on me for something, anything. This is torture. LET ME OUT!!